For many rappers, dreams are a positive experience, driving them forward with visions of the fame and fortune that lies in their (potential) future. Step into the psyche of a slumbering Joe Budden, however, and you’ll find no paradise, but rather a dark world in which the Slaughterhouse emcee does battle with his many personal demons. So, it’s pretty much like his music. On new mixtape leak Dreamerz, the Jersey mainstay offers a nocturnal perspective on the much-publicized relationship and breakup he chronicled in his Ordinary Love Sh*t trilogy. Backed by J. Cardim‘s haunting choral-synth instrumental (complete with a bluesy guitar solo), Budden once again puts their romantic quarrels and falling-out under the microscope, ultimately admitting that his emotional issues may have doomed their love from the start: “I’m selfish not selfless, and I say that with love / so in essence you’re asking for what I’m incapable of.” Topped off with the heartbroken hook and bridge vocals of frequent collaborator Emanny, this melancholy banger is just one of many set for inclusion on Mood Music 4.5, set to hit iTunes this Tuesday, May 24.